Thursday, September 30, 2004
Buddy Bean.
Mother daughter relationships. What a unique bond. The only woman in the world whom i can say I came out of her uterus, there is bound to be a unique tie between us. She knows of me what I allow her to see and I know of her what I can see. Unlike other relationships in life, I fairly rarely see my mother interact with others her age. She belongs in the family scene of the work place. I dont know if how she treats me is like how she treats everyone else because i only see her treating me. Besides the fact, i would have to say between my mother and I, there is the most unique bond.
We laugh more than most. Often it is like the period at the end of our sentances. SOme might say this suggests more joy in our relationship but it is not necesarily true. How we deal is with laughter. I get mad, she laughs. She screws up, I laugh. I tell about my day, we laugh. It fits into nearly every situation. Now if I truely veiwed my mom as my superior, would i be able to laugh at her mistakes and joke at her flaws? I don't know. Ever since the age of 10, when the first piece of the jigsaw puzzle known as my mom was given to me by my father, I have seen her less as a figure and more as a learning person. I see her struggle, I see her fight, I see her hold her tongue, I see her stick out. But most of all I see her love that covers everything that afflicts her. It's not so much like she is teaching me day be day, although sometimes i feel completely uneducated next to her, it is more like a companionship. She helps me grow, and I help her grow. I've learned how to cool her down, how to make her aware, and how to deal with her in a productive way. Just the same, she has learned how to deal with me, teach me how to succeed in light of her obstacles, and what life is about. I've never known anyone who talks to their mom like I do. I tell her the same jokes as my friends because she laughs at them, and just the same, she tells me about her relational problems at work. She shared with me her struggles with God, and I tell her about my aching heart. There are always some things that remain hidden in us. I truely don't know my mother. Each day i discover something new. I used to get so frustrated because she wouldn't tell me about herself. Wouldn't tell me about bulemia, OCD, ADD, everything and anything. But now i thank her. She gives me patience. Like a blanket, she unfolds slowly and I hope one day we can be best friends. Maybe then i will know my mommy..
¶ 10:30 PM
We laugh more than most. Often it is like the period at the end of our sentances. SOme might say this suggests more joy in our relationship but it is not necesarily true. How we deal is with laughter. I get mad, she laughs. She screws up, I laugh. I tell about my day, we laugh. It fits into nearly every situation. Now if I truely veiwed my mom as my superior, would i be able to laugh at her mistakes and joke at her flaws? I don't know. Ever since the age of 10, when the first piece of the jigsaw puzzle known as my mom was given to me by my father, I have seen her less as a figure and more as a learning person. I see her struggle, I see her fight, I see her hold her tongue, I see her stick out. But most of all I see her love that covers everything that afflicts her. It's not so much like she is teaching me day be day, although sometimes i feel completely uneducated next to her, it is more like a companionship. She helps me grow, and I help her grow. I've learned how to cool her down, how to make her aware, and how to deal with her in a productive way. Just the same, she has learned how to deal with me, teach me how to succeed in light of her obstacles, and what life is about. I've never known anyone who talks to their mom like I do. I tell her the same jokes as my friends because she laughs at them, and just the same, she tells me about her relational problems at work. She shared with me her struggles with God, and I tell her about my aching heart. There are always some things that remain hidden in us. I truely don't know my mother. Each day i discover something new. I used to get so frustrated because she wouldn't tell me about herself. Wouldn't tell me about bulemia, OCD, ADD, everything and anything. But now i thank her. She gives me patience. Like a blanket, she unfolds slowly and I hope one day we can be best friends. Maybe then i will know my mommy..
¶ 10:30 PM
